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Totally Gross, Grimy and Icky Calendars

By on October 11, 2012 in Bizarre calendars

Digressions from hygiene are a spice of life, but it’s not everyday that you meet icky. (Until of course you pick up these calendars and see for yourself that some people are making a clean living out of it). What’s the big deal with being sanitary anyway?

Germophobes are routinely the first to get sick from bacterial infection, while those who frequently pick their noses have the strongest immune systems. Could it be because their resident bacteria are far too crowded to accommodate more?

To strengthen your immune system, quit picking your nose, wash your hands and get a daily dose of gross with the calendars below.

The 2013 Learning Calendar of Gross Scientific Things

2013 scientific learning calendarThe 2013 Learning Calendar of Gross Scientific Things is an excellent fountain of knowledge, if you can stomach what you learn. Carmine, that bright red colorant that makes lipsticks ruby red, is also routinely added to yogurt and juice drinks. Carmine does make them look appetizing, but does it make these foods more palatable? Maybe not, after you learn that carmine comes from ground-up beetle.

And just because fish have scales doesn’t mean they don’t have lice. Or pus pockets…



The 2013 Learning Calendar of Gross Scientific Things, as informative as it is, may make you rethink about eating sashimi again (if you haven’t thrown up already).

365 Facts That Will Scare The Sh*t Out Of You Daily Calendar

365 scary facts calendar 2013This sounds fishy but true! There are fish small enough to sneak up on you and get into your ‘private plumbing’ (as you wonder what that ticklish thing is). And talking of small, can there be anything more microscopic than the 10 million bacteria that you just acquired from doing ‘mouse to mouth’ resuscitation? (You know, when you blow dust from your computer mouse?)

And who says the water you drink is really safe? Safe is relative, depending on the number of E. coli one may find in their water bottles at any given time.


It’s not yet too late in the year to buy the 365 Facts That Will Scare the Sh*t Out of You 2012 Daily Calendar if you’re especially fond of things morbid.

2013 Toilets of the World Wall Calendar

toilets of the world 2013 calendarNot as gross as what they are meant for, but receptacles of bodily fluids (and solids) are perhaps the last thing you want to think of when sitting down to dinner.

Of course, the 2013 Toilets of the World Wall Calendar is not meant to be hung in the kitchen, but enterprising souls find them as apropos gifts for plumbers, carpenters and builders and anyone with a sense of, well, toilet humor.

2013 Surviving the Zombie Outbreak Mini Calendar

2013 surviving the zombie outbreak calendarIf you couldn’t get enough of Plants vs. Zombies, the 2013 Surviving the Zombie Outbreak Mini Calendar should quench your blood thirst. The undead has always fascinated our collective consciousness, and this calendar is a fitting tribute to their eternal appeal.

Not as icky as you might expect, until you realize that the zombies’ idea of tasty snacks is fresh human flesh. But wait there’s more! The 2013 Surviving the Zombie Outbreak Mini Calendar celebrates Zombie Preparedness Day, a not half-bad idea when apocalypse is said to be just a few months away.

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7 Bizarre Calendars you don’t want in your home

By on April 28, 2012 in Bizarre calendars

Have you ever walked into a home that had a calendar on a table or wall which made you go “What was this person thinking?!”?

Some calendars that exist out there, in all honesty, are just plain weird, and here are a few of those calendars that you might want to seriously consider not purchasing for your home.

 (Although some people do put weird paintings and other bizarre things on their walls, so each to their own I guess).

1) 365 Days of Extreme Cakes 2013 Wall Calendar

365 days of extreme cakes 2013 wall calendarThe Extreme Cakes calendar has 365 pages showcasing the different designs of cakes for each date. First of all it’s weird why a person would want to see cakes every day of the year, but this calendar is really not recommended simply because looking at cakes every day will tempt you into indulging in sugary delights, just adding to your waistline…

However if you love cakes, you’ll find the Extreme Cake calendar here

2) Mutter Museum 2012 Wall Calendar

mutter museum 2012 wall calendarThis ghoulish calendar showcases 12 exhibits from the Mutter Museum in Philadelphia, which comprises of different body parts preserved or remodeled by a renowned surgeon named Dr. Thomas Dent Mutter.

The images are bizarre even if they are just photographs, and your guests might not appreciate looking at chopped up body parts when they are at your home for lunch.

Explore the Mutter Museum 2012 wall calendar here – if you dare

3) Outhouses 2012 Wall Calendar

outhouses 2012 wall calendarThis 2012 wall calendar showcases images of different outhouses (toilets). Seriously? It’s a wonder why people would want to create a calendar out of images of traditional toilets. Not only is the image that comes to mind unpleasant, (for some) it might be distasteful to display outhouses in plain sight anywhere in the home.

Having said that, I guess it all depends on what you find funny…

If outhouses are your thing, you’ll find this 2012 calendar here

4) What’s Your Poo Telling You 2012 Desk Calendar

whats your poo telling you 2012 daily calendarAnother desk calendar celebrating things that really shouldn’t be celebrated out in the open. This calendar has different bits of information regarding poo, also known as feces, for every date of the year.

While it’s good to gather general knowledge, I’m not sure how a year’s worth of poo trivia is going to help your dinner conversations. But then again, I guess it depends on where you are and who you’re with!

This bizarre 2012 desk calendar is available right here

5) Cow Abductions 2012 Wall Calendar

cow abductions 2012 wall calendarA 2012 wall calendar that showcases twelve official (or “official”, who knows) photo-documented images of cows being abducted by aliens. This could seem rather tacky, and the calendar descriptions probably say it all.

Spare yourself from being embarrassed when people laugh at your calendar. (On the other hand, it could be a real hit with your guests!)

To be honest a cow abduction calendar is the type of calendar I would buy

6) Six Word Memoirs 2012 Desk Calendar

six word memoirs 2012 desk calendarThis desk calendar comprises six word memoirs that are sarcastic or clever in nature. Though it may be interesting to read, it might not be really appropriate to look at it every day of the year.

Hmm, do you seriously want to be thinking about impending death every day? Not a fun way to live, as funny as these memoirs are.

Find the Six Word Memoirs 2012 Desk Calendar here

7) Who Farted? 2012 Wall Calendar

who farted 2012 wall calendarThis unique calendar has a picture of someone farting in public for each month of the year, with a button which when pressed gets the calendar to play one of the fifteen different fart sounds incorporated into the calendar.

No explanation needed as to why this calendar is bizarre and really should not be in your home. (Might make a good gift for certain friends though!)

Gift the Who Farted 2012 wall calendar to your friends here

There you have it, 7 really bizarre real calendars that you really don’t want to buy and look at the whole year long. While you may get one of these calendars if it showcases your humorous and quirky personality, the rest of your friends might not find these so tasteful. Life, however, does take all sorts, so don’t be ashamed if you have one in your home.

At the end of the day, calendars are to be looked at the entire year, so it’s important to pick one that isn’t too weird, not just for you but for others visiting your home as well!

What’s your thoughts on these bizarre calendars?

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